I started school at age 4, due to my birthday being in October. This was a total change for me – to be away from my mother for such a long time.
I don’t know when my behavior took a turn, but I do know it was early on in school. I had teachers that were kind to me for the most part, and I wanted all of that I could get.
Starting long ago, longer than I can remember, my life was filled with chaos (abuse). I never knew which way to turn, there was no safe place, especially when I was younger.
I felt used and unloved, though at the time, I probably couldn’t put those words to what I was feeling. Mostly, I just knew that I was scared.
Unfortunately, this resulted in the beginnings of negative behavior – seeking more attention from the teachers. I didn’t know any other way to get more of that accepted feeling that I had when I started school and no one knew me. There were 30-some of us in that class, so the teacher’s attention was spread pretty thin.
When I wasn’t acting out, by starting fights, or throwing things, or shooting staples around the room, I was taking it out on myself in the form of self-harm. Both of these types of behaviors carried on through the years, right into high school. It was there when things took another turn.
Experiencing difficulties in life is an inevitability. There has never been a singular person on this earth who did not experience a rocky path. Through these situations, though, we learn that it is not our circumstances that define us, but rather, how we react to them.
This week I am honored to share my good friend, Karen’s, story. She and I have been friends for almost 6 months now. I have greatly appreciated reading her posts, taking in her insights, and enjoying the pictures she takes. She is a beautiful lady with a heart for God. Her story is truly incredible. We hope you will enjoy it!
Say “hello” to Karen!
I grew up out in the country in upstate New York 50-something years ago. I had a father who was a pedophile, or whatever else he’d be called today, with his only daughter. Add to that I had a…